21 Days of Joy

The more I meditate, the more in touch I become with my soul's voice and my spiritual team that I pray to. What I have been hearing lately is to bring more joy into my life. The voice I hear doesn't just speak to me through my thoughts, it also repeats itself over and over again through things that are brought into my awareness such as books, articles, radio shows, conversations with others and more. The same theme repeats itself until I take notice and do something about it.

I work six days a week, run two small businesses, maintain a blog, and run the Kindness...Pass It On mission. I love everything I do, but my weekdays and weekends became so jam packed that I forgot to play. It was taking a toll on me. I realized I wasn't smiling or laughing as much as I used to. I was feeling drained and I needed to have fun again. 

For the last three weeks, I followed my joy. I spent time reading, meditating, making jewelry, going for walks, visiting the San Antonio Missions, going to the park, taking day trips, exploring nature, recognizing the kindness in others, and being present with my family. I also created future joy by getting tickets to see Eben Alexander author of Proof of Heaven in December, a holiday symphony, and a comedy show next year.

When I bought my new car, I decided to name her after Archangel Jophiel who is all about joy. She helps manifest joy and happiness, and brings beauty to all aspects of our lives. The car makes me feel happy and I wanted the name to be a reflection and reminder of that. Through the 21 Days of Joy, I rediscovered my joy of driving. I used to love going for long drives when I was younger. I would drive to the Jersey shore by myself frequently, and the journey was as peaceful as the ocean itself, Over these past three weeks, my husband and I would take long weekend drives through the Texas Hill Country and visit towns and shops together. It was relaxing and fun at the same time. It was so nice to get out, away from my office, breathe in the fresh air, enjoy the sky, the beautiful trees, and time with my love. I could feel the huge benefits in shaking up the routine I was trapping myself in.

In one of the towns we visited, I spotted a beautiful dog sitting under a bench. I wanted to go up and pet him. I just love animals. At the end of his leash was a man with his face painted in black and red. He said "For $5 you can get a picture of a real Comanche and a real Timberwolf." It actually took me aback for a moment with his gruff voice and the darkness of the paint hiding his face. For a moment I felt I was in another time and space. I said no thanks and walked past. I began reflecting on what is happening at the Standing Rock Indian Reservation in North Dakota because of the Dakota Pipeline Project. I kept thinking about the man and his wolf, and as we turned back to walk that way again, the Comanche and his companion were gone. I joked to my husband that they were spirits, since we couldn't find them anywhere, but my husband insisted that a spirit wouldn't need cash. I could definitely see the logic in that, but it was still a bit mysterious, and I really wanted to just give him some money if he needed it. 

Click link for photo credit: Kim Robbins Photography

My birthday coincided with my 21 Days of Joy, so I spent that day treating myself. I haven't shopped for myself in ages, primarily because of my weight gain. Now that I'm losing weight again, I am beginning to find the joy again in fashion, jewelry, and taking better care of myself. I bought myself a "goal" blouse as inspiration for my diet. I bought some Clinique skin care and blush. When I was checking out, the salesperson asked if I wanted to sign up for the Macy's rewards program. I said yes, and had to fill in my birth date. When she realized it was my birthday, she threw some free samples into my bag. When I got home, I realized she gave me "Happy" perfume and lotion! It was just too perfect for my joy mission!

What happens when you spend time focusing on what you want to bring into your life, is that the universe conspires to flood you with it. It is the same thing that happens when you focus on what you don't want. The universe doesn't see the difference, it's just giving you what you put your attention on. So, why not pick happy, joy, abundance, perfect wellness, healthy relationships, being on purpose, connecting with spirit, seeing the beauty in your children? It's all there, it always is. 

Realigning with joy in my life has re-energized me. It has helped me pour even more love, passion, and focus into all of the work I do. It has reconnected me with the most important relationships in my life, including myself. 

My next 21 days will be a revisit of 21 Days of Art. I had started it, but didn't follow through. Honestly, it scared me, which is why I need to do it again. Instead of enjoying something that I love to do, I put pressure on myself. I felt that what I was doing wasn't good enough or creative enough. That isn't what art is about, is it? One of the latest repetitive messages coming to me has been about the book The Artist's Way: A Spiritual Path To Higher Creativity by Julia Cameron. I ordered it, and it came in the mail yesterday. Of course it is exactly on point with what has been holding me back. This is yet another example to keep an eye, an ear, and an open mind to what the universe is providing. Everything is happening for us, not to us. I am now ready for 21 Days of Art, because I have joy on my side.

For more information on the books, authors and information mentioned in the blog, click on the links throughout to visit their sites!

In Gratitude & Love,

Kerri Mulhern
www.suitablegifts.com

21 Days...

I'm sure you've all heard that it takes 21 days to form a new habit. Well, I've decided to use that to work on my intentions for this year. My soul is leading the way. Oh the beautiful soul, it's always guiding us towards the best version of ourselves. It speaks so gently though, that our negative ego voice usually drowns it out. The more that I have been meditating, the easier it has become to hear its gentle nudges.

I have decided to work on something new every 21 days. Immersing myself completely in one area at a time, will give it roots to last beyond that time. As I move on to my next project, I will carry the one completed with me. It's not so I will end up with an overwhelming amount to do, but rather so I will continue to engage myself in all of the favorable ways my soul is pulling me towards. Habits are easy, so the goal is to have some really healthy and positive ones.

To begin, I've chosen space clearing (also known as clutter clearing). It is the one thing that bugs me the most. I chose it because I knew I would be thinking it about it the entire 3 weeks even if I chose something else. I want to be completely mindful of whatever it is that I'm working on. There will be no guilt, unreasonable demands, or struggles during these 21 days. This is about change, but it doesn't need to be miserable. It will all be joyful. 

I don't have a mess in my home. Well, except for this closet...

Oh well, there's no need to hide it from you. We're all friends here, right? There's so much crammed in there from business inventory, crafts, art supplies, kids memories to office supplies. It's the tiniest closet in the house, but it's in my office where I am most of the time, so in everything goes!

Generally, I've gotten much better at letting go and keeping things orderly. I have grown to prefer having much less. But, there is more to let go of: clothes that I don't wear or even like, office paperwork (that always seems to pile up), computer files, emails, tons and tons of photos & videos that need to be organized, and so many of my kids' memories. The kids' memories are the hardest for me to part with, but I know I will find some creative ways to wean and organize (Thank goodness for iPhones and flash drives, you can save everything in such a tiny space!). 

So that's where I'm starting, and I will report back in on what happens. Here are some other thoughts I have for upcoming 21 days throughout this year:

1. Fun & play. Very much needed!
2. Art. I went to college for art, and over the last 20 years I have barely made time to create. I miss it.
3. Writing. Another passion that I need to be more consistent with.
4. Reading. I love to read and learn, but I want to do more of it.
5. Nature. I love being outside, but I don't make the time for it. This will do it!
6. Flexibility. I currently have the flexibility of a 2x4.
7. Something new. I want to try new things that I have never done before. It's great for the brain and ramps up those courage muscles!
8. Living meditation. It's something I have thought about for quite awhile. I don't just want to feel the peace I have during and just after meditation. I want to live it all day by being mindful of it.

I will be making lots lists to prepare for what I will be doing. I just love lists (I probably should be doing 21 days of spontaneity...we'll see). If you have any thoughts for fun, nature, etc let me know! Do you have any intentions for this year? Share in the comments, I'd love to hear from you!

In Gratitude and Love,

Kerri
www.suitablegifts.com

Who Is Judging Who?

Lately my stories seem to happen when I'm walking.  It's been quite a road, to say the least! But the road has been paved with wonderful lessons, and I'm looking forward to what is next. 

As I finished up my three mile walk, I came upon one of my neighbors as I was heading back to my house to cool down. With sweat dripping from every pore on me, my neighbor decided she wanted to chat. I'm working on getting myself back into shape, but I certainly am still in the early stages where only I can notice the change.  She started to talk about her knee and how it was bothering her, and then quickly segued into ranting about her husband. She was disgusted by him because he is overweight.  

My first thought was, do you see who you're talking to? I'm literally a hot mess over here! I often take this walk with my husband, and he looks exactly the same as when he started, I look like I hosed myself down and painted my face bright red. I am not exaggerating in the slightest.

My second thought was, how could she speak of her husband this way? From my viewpoint, he is such a hard working man, very kind and loving towards his kids, always ready to help out a neighbor, and never speaks unkind of others.  

I was unnerved as she continued to say how sloppily he dressed, how his belly was hanging out over his shirt, and how he refused to do anything to help himself. She went on and on and on.  I felt the need to gently express the other side, because I have been heavy and thin, and heavy and thin again.  I know how hard it is for some people to lose weight.  I told her the things that I have gone through on my journey, but she was bent on being angry and critical. I told her I would pray for her husband. She rolled her eyes and said "Yeah, he needs prayer alright."

I left feeling upset and angry that she could speak of her husband like that.  I felt righteous in my judgement of her judgement of her husband.  Oh...wait a minute, am I'm judging too?  But my judgment is accurate, right?

No it wasn't.  I wish I could figure out all of these things right away, but honestly I am beginning to enjoy the lessons I am learning.  I have been reading non-stop all summer.  It has been a wonderful treat to myself to take the time to luxuriate in a good book. Most of what I read is of a spiritual nature, and I also love biographies.  The book I am now reading is called Codependent No More by Melody Beattie. It was recommended to me over a year ago. I bought it but never read it. Quite interesting that I picked this time to begin. 

I always thought being codependent referred to those involved with alcoholics or drug abusers. It means so much more.  It is anyone who has allowed someone else's problem to become their own, at the expense of taking care of their own needs.  I specifically read about people who are in relationships with overeaters. It was amazing to have the judgement I had towards my neighbor revealed to me from an entirely new perspective.  The situation impacts both of them.

I read that the codependent often seems angry, critical, hostile, manipulative, and controlling. Wow. Everything that I judged in my neighbor was as wrong as her judgement of her husband. As I read on, I understood more about her perspective, and my view of her "attitude" softened. I thought back about our conversation and I heard her words differently this time.  She was worried about her husband, her kids, her life.  She felt helpless and not in control of the situation. 
  
I also understand myself better.  I didn't realize I was being critical too, Now I notice quicker when I am judging someone, and I stop myself in my tracks and let it go.  I am being gentler on myself too, I know I'm learning.  And now I pray for them both.

In Gratitude,

Kerri
www.suitablegifts.com

My Walking Prayer

I began walking as a journey to get back to fitness and good health. I didn't expect it to be a spiritual journey as well. 

I have been finding more and more that the path I'm heading down never leads to where I think it will, and most times it leads to something even more wonderful than I had imagined. I began walking as a way to get back into shape. I allowed stressful thoughts, work, and life wreak havoc on my body. It was getting to the point of being very unhealthy, and I was ready to make a change.

Walking is not my favorite activity. I have extra bones floating around in my feet, and walking or even standing can be excruciating at times. Being outside in the Texas heat is also not a love of mine, I sweat just thinking about it. But I wanted something that could ease me back into better health, so I plodded forward.

I started with a mile and a half a day, the perimeter of my subdivision.  It was quite the trek at first scaling the hilly terrain with the painful feet, underused lungs, blazing heat, and bad attitude. I thought perhaps the attitude was the main problem, still I plodded on.

In the beginning I carried a heavier load than my weight,  I just didn't realize it at the time.  I felt that I was all alone, but all of my thoughts came with me.  They were not good company.  Many times they talked about what bad shape I was in, brought up everything I ever did wrong, reminded me of things they thought I should feel guilty for, or others who upset me.  My mind would race. The blood would be pumping from anger or hurt, not from exercise. I really started to dread the walks. Yet still, I plodded on.

But I was feeling physically better,  and I got my self up to 3 miles a day in a short amount of time.  I had more energy, changes were happening.  But what to do with my travel companions? It was truly time to let them go.  I was ready for that change too.

I thought about all I have been doing towards a spiritual path, and realized that I could literally walk that path every day.  I set aside time to meditate, to focus on what I want to attract into my life, but I never thought about doing that during my walks.  

Once I realized all of the negativity I was bringing along with me, I was able to release it the same way I do when I meditate.  I begin my walk with a mindful presence.  I notice everything around me, especially when my mind starts to wander.  It is very easy to come back to focus when you look at the trees, the butterflies flitting by, or the squirrels chasing each other around a tree.  

The next step for me was prayer.  As I round the first hill and the road levels, I begin my prayer.  I am at the point where I don't care who is around, or if they think I'm talking to myself.  The prayer is what's important, not what others think.  I also don't care if anyone sees me make the sign of the cross to close my prayer, it's something that feels right for me.  

I pray to God, to Jesus, to the angels. These companions on my walks are so much nicer! I thank them for everything in my life, even the things that seem bad.  In fact, my entire prayer is a thank you. I know in my heart now that what looks like a problem, is really a blessing. I just need to trust. 

I pray with thanks for what I want to bring into my life, and I pray in present tense as if it's already here.  I pray for my family, friends, and strangers. I pray for those that I am having difficulty with.  I have learned that the difficulty only lies in my choice to be upset, not in them anyway.  I have also learned that I don't need to have a battle with myself anymore either. Now that I have chosen to be lifted up through prayer on my walks, the pain has been lifted too: from my heart and my feet. And now I march on!

With Gratitude,

Kerri

www.suitablegifts.com