I Am A Student Of A Course In Miracles

Well, that wasn't something I thought I would ever write, but it's true I am a student of A Course In Miracles. Through the recommendation of my good friend Estella, I purchased the book last year. It had been calling to me, but I wasn't quite ready to answer it. It is said to be a channeled book from Jesus. That alone would make someone go hmmmm. It's not that I don't believe in channeling, I have read enough and listened to enough to understand that it is possible, anything is possible. And throughout this spiritual journey I have kept my mind open. But Jesus? That's pretty big! Over 2.2 million copies have been sold worldwide since its publication in 1976, and a majority of the spiritual teachers I follow refer often to the Course, so there must be something to it. 

After holding on to the book for a few months without reading beyond the preface. I just wasn't sure how to use the Course. I felt a bit intimidated. There are three sections to it, the Text, the Manual for Teachers, and the Workbook. The Text has over 600 pages. the Workbook has 365 lessons. While pondering when I would actually start this, and if I would even be able to understand what I was doing, as usual, the answer came. Hollie Holden announced on her Facebook page that she was going to start the Presence of Love Study Group to study A Course In Miracles. I joined right away, and the first lesson was to begin January 1st. It has been a beautiful introduction to the course. Hollie is just so lovely and she gives a daily live lesson on Facebook. She's in the U.K., so I listen to her after the live broadcast, but it is still just as powerful. The group has grown to over 850, with members from all over the world. Any member of the group can post on the page for guidance and support, as well as leave messages of kindness and love. It is a safe place to bare your soul and not feel judged. The lessons can bring up quite a bit of feelings, so it is so helpful to have a supportive group who understands.

Today I am on Lesson 93. I read two pages of text a day, so I will complete that part by the end of the year along with the lessons. I spend 20-30 minutes listening to Hollie's lesson, another 15 minutes reading the text and lesson, and then 15-20 minutes of meditation. This may sound like so much time, but it isn't. I listen to Hollie's video lesson while I'm still in bed trying to wake up (sometimes at the gym when I'm riding the bicycle), I read while I'm drinking my morning coffee and eating breakfast, and I was already meditating every morning anyway. The lesson is also practiced throughout the day. Honestly, I do get busy, so the lesson isn't always practiced throughout the day! I do what I am able to, but the messages are still sinking in. I intend to follow this through for the year and see where it takes me. 

In the beginning I had ups and downs. I definitely had doubts about the whole idea of this. I moved away from organized religion because I didn't feel connected to it. I felt on the outside looking at something I could never be good enough, or perfect enough to feel welcome. Spirituality has felt more all inclusive. There were parts of the readings that have brought me back to that religious feeling. I felt like I was being told to follow this way, as it's the only way. I hadn't felt close to Jesus in a long time as well. I felt a block, a disconnect. I know I created it, but I'm not really sure why. I know it bothered me that I felt like religion was teaching me that the only way to God was through Jesus. I kept thinking, I can talk to Him any time I want to, I don't need to go through Jesus! It felt like another pressure that I had to do things a certain way or I couldn't be close to God. 

Heading into my fourth month of the Course. I feel differently, my heart is opening. I am feeling a change through this daily practice. The Course is a return to love, a return to God. It is an undoing of the destructive thoughts of the ego. It is about true forgiveness of oneself and others. It is the realization that our judgments are blocking us from true vision. Have you ever had this image in your mind of what someone was all about, then got to know them and realized you had made up a story in your mind? Apparently, that's what we are doing constantly. This new journey at times been challenging and fascinating. It has shown me that when I look at another, they are serving as a mirror. How I react to them is mirroring back something that I need to know about myself. When I am being judged, it is a reflection of the one doing the judging and vice versa when I am judging. The truth is, we are all One. Judgment, anger and hatred is not of love (God), it is of fear. 

There is no separation, even though it may appear that way. We are also all a part of God (or Source, Divine Mind, or whatever feels right to you). It can be hard to fathom this when there appears to be so much chaos, evil, narcissism, and hatred going on in the world. But I'm not speaking of the choices of a warped ego, I am speaking of the soul. We are a soul in human form, not a human with a soul. And God loves us unconditionally despite our perceived wrong doings. I know this may dredge up so much of how we have been treated poorly, abused, or judged. It definitely brought it all up to the surface for me. Through the lessons, I realized how much of my time was consumed with the same grievances for the same people or situations day after day after day. This Course is about forgiveness, and that probably is what really kept me from it. I am a work in progress, but the book is helping. What I can say at this point, is it feels much better to let go and forgive, than to hold on to anger and resentment. 

I am not at all suggesting to hang out with the person who harmed you. I am not saying to commend those in the world who do not have the kind and inclusive beliefs you do. If there is a part of you that can suspend the story you've been telling yourself about the other person (family member, friend, boss, political figure, etc.) and imagine that there is something deeper that you hadn't considered that caused them to be who they appear to be, would saying a prayer for their return to love be so hard to do? The thing is, not only can that silent blessing change them, it changes you. That is what it is for, to free you.

And how much do we judge ourselves? We are One, we are the same Divine souls that everyone else is. This prayer by a Benedictine nun sums it up quite perfectly: 

O God

help me to believe

the truth about myself-

no matter how beautiful it is!

Macrina Wiederkehr

Do you know how beautiful you are? Maybe it's time for a re-introduction to you.

In Gratitude & Love,

Kerri Mulhern
www.suitablegifts.com

New Year's Eve Reflections

I am seeing so many posts on social media of people being so "done" with 2016. I've even said it myself, it felt like it was the year that everyone died. There seemed to be so much upheaval, tragedy, tumultuous activity (the election, oy). There was so much. But of course, those are the things that get the most attention on the news and social media. There was goodness, love, kindness, giving, and miracles happening too, there always is. And by now, you know where I choose to put my focus on (even if I stray for a moment or two).

If you are into numerology at all, you know 2016 is a 9 year (add up the numbers 2+1+6=9). It's a year of completion, of endings. It doesn't have to be a bad thing, it can be a time of forgiving and letting go. It also means that the cycle begins again and 2017 (2+1+7=10, 1+0= 1) is a year of 1. This is a year of beginnings, and I can already feel that it is going to be a fantastic year ahead.

Our year, our life can be whatever we choose it to be, depending on how we view it. I choose to see the good in it, no matter the circumstances. I have come to realize in what seems like the worst of times (I have had plenty of them), there is good in it. There is a lesson, there is a knowing that better times are ahead, there is an extreme gratitude in the knowledge that I am being taught and loved by a team of divine guides who have always been there, even when I didn't know it.

For me, this year brought incredible blessings, I met authors and beautiful souls don Miguel Ruiz, don Miguel Ruiz Jr., and Eben Alexander author of Proof of Heaven. I connected with Karen Kubicko, read her beautiful book Life Is Just Another Class about her past lives and had an incredible reading from her about my guides and past lives. I spoke with Hay House authors Liana Werner-Gray and Denise Linn, received wonderful advice and received a book The Earth Diet from Liana, and a course from Denise. Denise also tapped into a past life of mine where I acquired my foot pain. The course she gifted me, is going to help me resolve it. Skye Dyer noticed and acknowledged my #WayneDyerWednesday posts on Instagram that I started to honor her dad Dr. Wayne Dyer. From there, I connected with Skye, Serena and Saje Dyer and was able to thank them, and share with them how grateful I am to their dad. I got to know Kate Mackinnon and learned a new healing modality CST (cranial sacral therapy) through her amazing book From My Hands and Heart. I became friends with the most beautiful soul sisters and brothers on Instagram who are on a similar path, are kind, supportive, enthusiastic, humorous, and genuine. I reunited with three soul sisters I met at an I Can Do It! event in Austin in 2013. I met two of them in Austin for dinner, and one came to my town for the week. It was wonderful to catch up, I feel like we have known each other forever (we probably have!) I became even closer with my friends from my youth, even though we live so far away. One of them even visited this year for a week, and three of my other friends and I are planning a long weekend together next year. 

I took another step into public view with my business and participated in events to showcase my products. Sales doubled again this year. I learned more, worked on my website, blogged more, and wrote from my heart without fear of what other people would think. I worked with the amazing healer & Hay House author Abby Wynne (her latest book is How To Be Well) to create a special collection of her quotes on the products I sell. I also participated in a wonderful contest she created with her latest book and items from the collection. 

I worked more on the Kindness...Pass It On mission to provide intentional acts of kindness. I created Kindness tags to support the mission, and received more requests from all over the world for Kindness Cards. 

I really learned to take care of myself this year.  I started my diet with Nutrisystem and have lost 17 1/2 pounds so far. I plan to have the rest of the excessive poundage lost by this coming summer. I have learned to cook better food, do yoga, meditate and exercise. This will be a lifelong process not just a quick fix. I learned to take time for myself to do the things that bring me joy, help me to relax, and nourish my soul. By giving to myself, I am much more energized and joyful to give to those I love.

I received an amazing job offer through a beautiful friend I have known for years. It came when I wasn't looking for it, and it was the nicest surprise. The company has a group of fun, kind, hard working, and appreciative people that makes it a pleasure to be a part of. I work remotely, yet I feel so close to this group that are scattered around the country.

One of the toughest moments this year was losing my sweet kitty Pepper. We had her since she was a kitten, and she was such a love. She would hop on my desk while I was working, purr and snuggle up next to my laptop. She is a beautiful soul. I miss her sweet face and her adorable personality. It's not the same, but she's still here. Yes, I have had signs from Pepper. This may have to be another blog, she's pretty clever in how she shows me her presence. Pepper is a beautiful sign of our eternal nature.

I started a course by Sonia Choquette called Ask Your Guides. I am learning to connect and understand how spirit communicates with us. It's a four week course and I'm halfway through. I experienced a miracle in the second week. It was really for two people in my life who I love very much, and I won't give details because I honor their privacy. But it was something that wasn't right for years, and through the course I was praying for help. I learned to write to my helper guides, and I learned how to do automatic writing for a response back. The writing showed me not to panic, and not to interfere in the way I thought I should. I needed to relax, and know that it was going to be ok. I listened and I followed the guidance I received.  I learned to write an invocation to ask for help. Two days after the invocation, the situation was resolved. All is well, in fact all is better than well. There is so much help around us at all times, all we need to do is ask. We may not get the answer we expect, it may not be the way we wanted to do it, but the help we receive is for our greater good. We just need to let go, and trust.

I learned that what we put our attention on is what we draw towards us. The more I wanted to learn about spirituality, past lives, art, health, and abundance, the more it appeared. Books, authors, teachers, courses all arrived. This is happening for all of us, all the time, we just need to start noticing it. I learned how important it is to catch myself in negative thinking, and let it go. I also learned through keeping a gratitude journal, how the things there are to be grateful for double, triple, quadruple when you take the time to notice the good things that are happening. I write them down, I say thank you aloud when it happens. Celebrate all that goes right, it is far better than blaming the divine when something goes wrong. Life isn't happening to us, it's happening for us.

I am extremely grateful to all of my friends and family who have supported my business by purchasing items, sharing my social media posts, reading my blogs, and commenting. My business and my blog has been the deepest expression of what I want to share with the world, and your support has meant more than I can express. I am so thankful to all of you for your friendships, love and for being a part of my journey and for allowing me to be a part of yours. I know our paths have crossed before, and I am certain they will cross again as we all continue to learn, grow, live, and love. 

I have so many plans for the year ahead. I'm very excited for continued spiritual growth, business growth, joy and fun with my family & friends. I will expand upon it in my New Year's Day blog!

Much love to you all! Wishing you peace, love, joy, perfect wellness, abundance and all you intend for the New Year!

In Love & Gratitude,

Kerri Mulhern
www.suitablegifts.com

Book Review: The Mastery Of Self by don Miguel Ruiz Jr.

"The human journey is a process of the Divine becoming aware of itself." 

- don Miguel Ruiz Jr.

This May I had the honor to attend an evening with don Miguel Ruiz and don Miguel Ruiz Jr.  It was a magical night as you can read about in my May 19th blog. That night I purchased don Miguel Ruiz Jr.'s latest book The Mastery of Self - A Toltec Guide To Personal Freedom. I was thrilled to have him sign the book that night. There is energy everwhere, and along with the energy of the book, there is energy in his signature. And from what I felt in the church that evening, his energy is pure love.

I was very excited to read this book. It looks like a small, quick read, but it is packed and overflowing with wisdom. I really took my time with this one because he provided exercises in each chapter, and I wanted to do everything. As you can probably tell by now, one of my passions is self-improvement and learning to be my best self. What I learned through don Miguel Ruiz Jr.'s book, is that my Authentic Self is already perfect. I just need to let go of the masks and unconditional love for myself and others (and a few other very important things, but you'll read about it in the book yourself!).

"As a Master of Self, the way out is to remind yourself that you are perfect in this moment and you don't need to do or achieve anything in order to be complete."

- don Miguel Ruiz Jr.

The biggest challenge in my life has been forgiveness. It is the biggest obstacle I have been avoiding. However, I knew that I would have to face it eventually if I wanted to live my best life possible. It's amazing how life works when you tune in and see how everything is really guiding you home to your true nature. I recently had a really heartfelt conversation with my bestie. I was telling her about a pivotal, heartbreaking moment in my life. She said she felt like this was the final piece, the one thing I needed to let go of to be free and to essentially live the life I was intended here for. Our conversation was just after I read Chapter 4: Unconditional Love For Others. The exercises in this chapter put me on the path to freedom in this area. I don't want to give the book away, but I will say the first part involved writing a letter (something I've talked about doing for awhile) to the person that caused that "thing", that "moment" that feels like changed everything, and not for the better. I had been avoiding the letter. But I did it this time, I saw it through. For the first time I got it all out, I told my story from the perspective of the young girl I was. It wasn't as difficult or frightening as I thought it would be. The next two parts of the exercise are what set me free. Thank you don Miguel!

The other huge thing that this book helped me with is weight loss. This is yet another struggle that I just wrote about in my last blog. Again, I was just thinking about my struggle with losing weight, and there comes Chapter 8: Goal Setting. This chapter taught me that I am perfect already and I need to love myself as I am whether I achieve my goals or not. This chapter provided a beautiful approach to setting goals in a positive and healthy way. It's been of immeasurable use. Thank you again don Miguel!

As I've mentioned, there is so much packed into this book. I wanted to give a couple of examples of how it helped me, but there is so much more. There are grounding exercises, mantras, reflections on our attachments, the roles we play, the projections we put onto others and more. 

I know for everyone reading The Mastery of Self, it will hit at the core of something in your life that really needs to be brought to the surface and released. It will give you an awareness into something profound in your life, and will give you a new perspective. It will reveal the truth and give concrete steps to awareness and freedom. And above all, this is all done with love. Obviously I highly recommend this book! I also highly recommend checking out don Miguel Ruiz Jr.'s book signing schedule and events. 

You can click on the links in the blog or click here for more information:
To order The Master of Self: click here
For don Miguel Ruiz Jr.'s Book Signings & Events: click here

In Gratitude & Love,

Kerri Mulhern
www.suitablegifts.com

"I'm Like Rainbow Love" - Meeting My Spirit Guide Alicia Through Karen Kubicko

If you enjoyed my last blog about my reading with Karen Kubicko, and the introduction to my spirit guide Mr. Martin, then get ready for more!

As my reading with Karen Kubicko, (author of Life Is Just Another Class) continued, she talked about a pretty spirit guide who has been with me for hundreds of lifetimes. But before elaborating further, she turned the discussion towards my past lives. She saw my past lives to the left of me (5 angels behind me and 15 spirit guides to the right) and mind you, she is seeing all of this on the phone 1,700 miles away from me. She told me I was a writer for a living in five past lifetimes. It was nice to hear because I have enjoyed writing (and reading!) since I was young. I was always writing poems, stories and comics growing up. I had considered going to college for writing, but chose advertising design instead. Karen told me I was even a writer back in Alexandria, Egypt (3rd century BC). She told me I had written books that were in the Royal Library of Alexandria that was later destroyed by several fires, including those set by Caesar's army in 48 BC and an attack from Aurelian in 270 AD. This library and its contents became a symbol for loss of cultural knowledge.

(That's me climbing the ladder in the back right. Sorry, just a little past life humor...)

Karen said I was also a healer in 12 different lifetimes and can acquire those skills in this lifetime as well. She told me that I was killed for being a healer in 8 of those lifetimes. The people at the time thought it was witchcraft. A child had died and they thought it was my fault. 

She asked if I wanted to know how I died. Of course I did! I didn't feel afraid, it was in the past and I am safe now. So I hope you don't mind if I share this with you too. Or you can always skip this paragraph. Okay, here we go! In one lifetime my head was cut off. I was called to heal someone in the family of a king-type person. I wasn't able to heal the child, so it was off with my head in the guillotine. Ick. I also ran through a sword in another lifetime. That one sounds pretty painful too. And in another lifetime I was barricaded in my home, and it was burned to the ground. It was pretty rough back then.

Karen told me to offer forgiveness to those who killed me, because they didn't understand that the person chose how they wanted to pass. It was not my fault. She told me to do this eight times for each lifetime that my life ended this way. This is a way to cut the cords tying me to those lifetimes, and to set myself free from anything connecting me to them. It's healing. I recently did this and let it all go.

As I'm writing this on my living room couch (I write everything on paper before I type it up, as I feel more connected that way.), my husband is heading outside with a large saw to cut some overgrown limbs (cue the guillotine flashback). He stops to grab the phone because an appraiser is coming by today to look at our roof. We have a leak from all of the Texas rain we've been getting. As he hands me the phone to keep beside me, he says "Martin." (Remember my spirit guide Mr. Martin from my last blog? If you haven't read it yet, take a look, it's a good one!) In shock, I said "Martin?" He said "Yes, Molly Martin," and grabbed the notecard he wrote with her name and number, and handed it to me too. Yes, our insurance appraiser's last name is Martin. 

I am quite a believer in synchronicities, and I even write them down in my gratitude journal. Since my reading with Karen, there have been so many similar events. And being that I've completely sidetracked this blog, I'll share another Mr. Martin story. I was in my car last week to pick up lunch, and I was praying as I usually do in the car. It's just one of those places that have become a quiet, sacred space for me. I feel mindful and close to God, Jesus, the angels and archangels...the whole spiritual gang. I started talking to Mr. Martin. I just had a feeling that he didn't want me to call him Mr. Martin any longer. I said "What would you like me to call you now?" The first thing that came into my head was "Poppy." I have been trusting my intuition more and more through reading books like Sonia Choquette's Trust Your Vibes and online course like Doreen's Virtue's Clairvoyance Therapy class. So I said to him "If Poppy is what you want me to call you, can you please show me a dragonfly today and make sure I can see it, as my eyes aren't so great anymore."

I picked up lunch and started driving home. I noticed the traffic on the highway, and decided to stay on the access road. I ended up turning off to go the back roads on a street I usually don't take, but am familiar with. As I drove, I saw a bug fly across my car, but I wasn't certain if it was a dragonfly or not (and I almost swerved off the road trying to look at it). So I said aloud "Could you please clearly show me a dragonfly easily so that I don't drive off the road?" In less than 3 minutes, a dragonfly flew across my windshield. So Poppy it is!

Now back to my other spirit guide. She's been through hundreds of lifetimes with me, including my healing lifetimes. She's helping me and guiding me into the healing realm. She said it was necessary for me to see my past lives first and now we'll chat. She's had hundreds of lifetimes to help me understand my healing talent. Karen asked me if I had any books around me. I chuckled as I stared up at all of the spiritual and inspirational books lining my bookshelves.She said my guide brings books into my awareness on purpose, like Wayne Dyer. Then Karen seemed surprised by the message "He's doing well on the other side." I wasn't surprised at this point, I talk to Dr. Dyer in my prayers every day too, and thank him for all he's done to help me in my life. It was really special to hear that message.

Karen went on to describe my spirit guide. She said she was dressed in a chiffon, flowy dress with pastel orange over yellow, pink and green sleeves almost to the elbow. "I'm like rainbow love!" she told Karen. It sounds like rainbow love! Karen said in all seriousness she is healing me on all chakra levels in learning how to heal others. She said she was wearing a crown tiara with blue crystals and pastel purple, glittery shoes. I want this outfit!!! She said again she's healing me on all chakra levels, color can be so healing.

Karen asked me if I wear color. I said I love it, but I'm wearing alot of black because I'm fat. I have released the need to beat myself up or put myself down, but I felt that was truthful, so I said it. She said that I don't need to protect myself any more and I'll lose the weight. She said to forgive "that" away. As I forgive "that" (and she said it happened more than once), I will lose easily. It is amazing that Karen picked up on "that" with only speaking with me one time. What she is talking about has never been written about or even spoken about, even to my closest friends. I'm not sure if it was more than once, but I I have wondered since what I do remember, I was so young (around 6). But one memory was enough to carry a heavy weight (literally) until now. Honestly, just writing this little bit has me in tears, and then typing it has me crying. I have been thinking of this for awhile, and my plan is to write a letter about it, to let it all out. I'm not going to mail it, I'm going to burn it, say a prayer and release it from my life finally for good. Thank you Karen, for yet another HUGE healing moment from a two hour phone call. 

Karen said to add color to my wardrobe. And since our talk, I have. I'm in pink, green (for Poppy!) and lots of bright colors. And I have to say, it brightens my whole day. I don't need to be thin to feel happy, and color makes me feel happy.

Karen told me my spirit guide's name is Alicia Montgomery. She has long hair, 5-6 inches past her shoulders, blondish-brown with a wave. Karen told me she hasn't always been my guide. I asked if she was ever in a lifetime with me, and she said she hasn't been, but has had the honor to watch over me. Alicia told Karen that she gave me her full name for my sake to connect with her. I really do like having a name.

Alicia keeps guiding me to books. She knows it's opening up talents that lay latent. (Books are constantly coming my way, in amazing and unexpected ways.) Karen said as a "small baby child" I tried to heal a dog (in this present lifetime), but I was young and didn't realize what I was doing. I don't remember that, but it is possible since one of the dogs we had when I was a kid was thrown down a flight of stairs. This is yet another story I've never talked about. I don't remember how young I was at the time, but the dog had seizures ever since. 

There was quite a theme with this reading about children. From my five lifetimes with Mr. Martin where I died under ten years old, my death with him at seven, which coincided with my life-threatening appendectomy in this lifetime at age seven, my abuse in this lifetime at age 6, and the children in my healing lifetimes that died so young. So what does it all mean? I'm not completely sure yet, but I think maybe this lifetime is to learn to forgive myself, forgive others, and let it all go.

I have been learning about forgiveness. It has been a challenge for me. But what I am understanding now, is that you forgive for yourself. It doesn't mean what the person did was right,  and it doesn't mean you have to hang out with them. It means you let go of the pain and attachment that hurt was causing you. That is freedom.

Whether I'll end up as a healer, a writer, or both is yet to be discovered. But I know I am keeping myself open to everything, and will continue to learn, grow, meditate, and pray. I also know we are never alone. All of the answers are with us all the time, we just need to listen.

Thank you again Karen Kubicko! The reading was healing on so many levels. It was above and beyond anything I expected. It is an honor to know you. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

To contact Karen for more information or a reading, visit her blog at: https://karenkubicko.wordpress.com and to order her book, click here: Life Is Just Another Class (it's amazing, my next blog will be the review).

In Gratitude & Love,

Kerri Mulhern
www.suitablegifts.com