Healing Hands

After my Reiki I certification, I went through 21 days of Reiki. Every morning before I got out of bed, I did Reiki on myself along with chakra balancing. It was a great way to practice and to experience Reiki fully. I found that things that normally would have annoyed me didn't. This included the salsa jar I opened that exploded all over myself, the kitchen counter, the walls, and the towels. It made me laugh instead of scream! 

I noticed synchronicities and lessons became more vivid and obvious. I am one who notices the signs the universe is providing us with, and Reiki helped them be more clear, and sometimes just so over the top. It was wonderful!

Reiki does wonders for anxiety, as does meditation. It has become a beautiful addition to my daily self care. It helps on so many levels of healing, but I have been so grateful for how much it calms me. 

I spent the two months in between my Reiki I and Reiki II classes healing myself, giving Reiki to my houseplants, and my sweet cat Scar. I really wasn't feeling confident yet to work on other people, I wanted the Reiki II class before I started that, as I knew I would be learning more about healing, symbols, and would have another attunement. But I did find one person to at least practice a little bit on. They were helping me as a kindness, wasn't a believer in this form of healing at all. But I appreciated the help because at least I could practice and feel better about working on people in the Reiki II class. 

When I worked on this person I felt nervous at first honestly. But as I continued up her body, I felt more and more relaxed. It seemed like she was too! When I got up to her head and finished, I started to remove my hands. With her eyes still closed, she waved her hands repeatedly towards her head and asked me to put them back! She kept saying "I need to get back, I need to get back." I was stunned. Reiki doesn't make you psychic, so it's not that I can tell what the person is feeling or thinking. I can feel heat in my hands, tingling, and I'm sure as I continue to use Reiki, my intuition and senses will become more pronounced and active. I could tell something was happening, but I didn't know what. 

Afterwards, the person told me that she could see a valley and in the middle was a blue light shaped like an hourglass. She just wanted to get to the light to see what it was. I could feel it was a spiritual experience, and this was when I truly felt the power of Reiki. I have healing hands! I don't mean this from an egoic level. Reiki is flowing through me, I'm not doing the healing, Reiki is. I'm a conduit for healing, a grateful conduit. My teacher Kim told us that even if someone doesn't believe in Reiki, it works anyway. And this certainly proved it! And it was something I needed as much as she did. I really needed to know if Reiki would flow through me. It was a gift for both of us, and I am grateful to my friend who let me practice, to Reiki, and to my teacher Kim.

Reiki can heal on all levels, emotionally, spiritually, physically and mentally. There doesn't need to be a dramatic event such as my friend had. As a matter of fact, some people don't feel anything at all during Reiki, but it still is healing. It does not replace a doctor, a needed surgery, or medication, but it can certainly compliment them. It is tapping into universal life force energy that is available and is in all of us. and all around us. It is love.

I am so grateful that my spiritual journey has led me to this path of healing. I'll be sharing my Reiki II experience in my next blog. I am grateful to you all for sharing this with me too.

In Gratitude & Love,

Kerri Mulhern
www.suitablegifts.com

Week Three: The Ceiling Came Down

After two weeks of resting my foot, I was still going to the gym four days a week. I would wear the walking boot and not do anything that put pressure on my right foot. After each visit though, my foot was aching so much that I couldn't wait to get home and tear the boot off. I tried giving up seated leg exercises, but I was still in pain. I wasn't sure if the boot was causing the pain, or having any weight on my foot was doing it. 

I didn't want to waste any of these 6 weeks trying to figure it out, so I decided to take a break from the gym and completely rest my foot. I am doing floor leg exercises and my dumbells at home, but that's it.  

But there is still the weight issue. More Googling and it looks like the people that primarily go to the podiatrist for Posterior Tibial Tendonitis are runners and overweight middle-aged women. Guess what category I fall into? After two weeks of eliminating sweets, treats, fast food, and soda, there has been no weight loss.

I firmly decided at the beginning of this week that I had enough and was going to lose this weight. What is the point of resting my foot, only to re-injure it as soon as all this weight is applied back onto it? I wondered why the podiatrist didn't suggest losing weight to avoid surgery, since it is listed as one of the contributing causes. By Wednesday I dropped 3 1/2 pounds just by letting go of a small amount of what I had been consuming. I felt a bit light-headed, but I have experienced that before when starting a diet. I figured I'm going through a bit of a detox and my body is reacting to less calories.

I didn't feel cravings for anything bad to eat. The cravings are usually my downfall.  I felt different, not obsessed with losing weight, but comfortably leaning into it. I also haven't been thinking about food incessantly like I used to. I have been able to go hours without wanting something to eat. I know this may sound ridiculous to most, but it really was a problem for me. I thought back to my Reiki, chakra balancing, and reflexology massage at the Integrative Healing Institute, and wondered how it impacted how I was feeling. Kim Krost did do some lymphatic draining on my right leg, which can cause weight loss. Could this have had such an impact on my body?

I had a day where I considered not wearing the boot anymore. It seemed to be causing me pain when I wore it for just a few minutes. I tried just using my sneakers with the orthotics and my foot was not in pain. It felt a bit weak, but I would make sure I was thoughtful in my steps, walking the way Gary Ramsey taught me, from my heel to the outside of my foot, to the ball of my foot, instead of the usual walking on the inside of my arch. After a day I had regret that maybe I would hurt it, since overall my foot was definitely feeling better. So I'm wearing the boot when I'm walking, and I take it off whenever I sit down or use my knee scooter. I also cancelled my 3 week podiatry check up. I'm deciding whether to give this doctor another try in 6 weeks, or find someone else. 

So now about the ceiling. We had a leak in the roof almost two years ago. It ended up leaking right into the ceiling in my office. We had the roof patched back then, and things seemed fine. We had some rain this past week and the leak came back even more furiously. The textured ceiling came down right onto my chair. Do I think this was just a coincidence in all of this foot drama? Of course not, I see meaning in everything. I know that leaks and plumbing issues are a symbol for something internal, just about every issue you can have in your home is really about yourself. Most everything that occurs is really just life holding up a mirror to yourself, to show you something you need to see. I now see a parallel between the roof leaking two years ago and the naming of my car Jophiel, along with the subsequent craving for yellow (both about my third chakra issues). I wish I would have seen all of this sooner. So, what does a leaking roof mean? Here's a few I found:

• Water represents the flow of our emotions, so a leaky roof could mean feeling emotionally overwhelmed.
• In Feng Shui it can indicate health issues, specifically blood flow in the body.
• A leaky roof can also mean that any negativity in the home is releasing.
• Water is also associated with our career or journey. It can mean career or life path could be unchecked, all over the place, or there's lack of direction or focus. 

For me, I know had been feeling exhausted emotionally and physically. Since this was happening in the room that I work in, I also believe it has to do with my career path. Overall I see that my third chakras issues were showing me that I needed to take care of myself before everything (the ceiling) caved in. I need to contemplate this more, so I will of course meditate, meditate, and meditate some more. 

I'm still using the massager twice a day, taking epsom salt baths, meditating, and grounding myself while using my chakra stones as Kim taught me. I still need to use the sage sticks to clear my aura too, I'll incorporate them next week. I'm relaxing, writing daily in my gratitude journal, reading, and working on my businesses instead of worrying, doing too much, and stressing. It all feels good.

By Sunday to start my fourth week, I'm down 5 1/2 pounds.I know this is quite a bit in a week, but it is my first week. I'm also not really dieting, not counting calories, I'm listening to my body for the first time in, well, forever. It is easier this way, I'm not feeling deprived, I'm feeling in balance.

Until next week...

In Gratitude & Love,

Kerri Mulhern
www.suitablegifts.com

Faux Anxiety

I have struggled with anxiety for most of my life. What works best for me now to maintain balance are natural methods including meditation and a daily spiritual practice. Both keep me grounded and at peace. I am sharing an experience I had last month, because for the first time, I had an induced anxiety experience. 

One night when I was trying to sleep, my heart started to palpitate. It was beating normally, and then there was this periodic hard beat. It hurt and it scared me. I would change sleeping positions and it would go away for a time, but eventually it came back and I would have to readjust myself again. I felt extremely nervous and I couldn't sleep. I have infrequently experienced this sensation before, but I could never figure out what was causing it. 

The next morning my whole body was a nervous wreck. I didn't have the chest pain, but I felt awful and stressed. I tried to figure out what brought this on, it was extreme anxiety and it wasn't typical for me. 

I had skipped a few meditations, so I thought maybe that was it. I meditated and felt calm for a short time after, but it soon came back in full force. I went food shopping and felt horrible on the drive and at the store. I was so nervous and the feeling kept coming in unstoppable waves. I tried becoming aware of my breath, and doing some relaxing breathing, but it didn't help. It was beyond anything I had ever experienced before, and I couldn't stop it. 

There was nothing exceptional going on in my life that was troubling me or weighing on my mind. I couldn't imagine where this was coming from. It felt like a constant panic attack. From what I have read, panic attacks go through a cycle, peak and then subside. This didn't subside, it was relentless and unbearable. 

I went through daily anxiety and nightly chest palpitations for two days when I finally figured out what it was. It was this:

I normally avoid artificial sweeteners, as I know they can affect mood, and I don't think that they are particularly healthy. Well, I let that rule slide because I've been on my never-ending diet, and I wanted something low-cal to drink besides water. I bought a case of my favorite, tasty, diet drink: Fresca. When I have bought it in the past (rarely, but like I said, it's so tasty!), I have no more than one can every few days. This time, I went on a binge and had two cans a day. It was a very bad idea and I should have stuck to water, seltzer, and tea.

It took four days to get the effects of the aspartame out of my system. And now thinking back, perhaps the times that I have had palpitations, it was when I had a Fresca (or something else that I didn't notice had an artificial sweetener in it). I probably didn't notice the cause before because I wasn't drinking as much and didn't have the other excessive symptoms. After this experience, I have become even more label conscious and realized aspartame was lurking in my yogurt and sucralose in my favorite fruit cup. Those who are sensitive to aspartame can experience headaches, dizziness, confusion, memory loss, blurred vision, severe depression, irritability, anxiety attacks and more. I have also learned that when I see this on the label: Phenylketonurics - contains phenylalanine, it is another indicator that aspartame is in the food.

I wanted to share this not as a substitute for medical care. Obviously if you having heart palpitations or anything that is out of the ordinary, see a doctor for a proper diagnosis. But I wanted to share my experience as a suggestion to think beyond stress, hormones, or brain chemistry as the cause of anxiety and panic attacks. It is possible that it could be something lurking in your food, it just could be faux anxiety. And the best part is, with simply monitoring of the ingredients in the food you eat, this can be staved off.

In Love & Gratitude,


Kerri Mulhern
www.suitablegifts.com