Thursday, October 8, 2015

Book Review: Assertiveness for Earth Angels by Doreen Virtue




I absolutely love Doreen Virtue and I've never met a Hayhouse book I haven't liked. As a recovering people pleaser, Assertiveness for Earth Angels: How to be Loving Instead of "Too Nice" by Doreen Virtue was the perfect choice as my latest read. This one actually screamed out to me. 

Doreen describes Earth Angels as highly sensitive people with an innocence regarding love and life, believing in God's loving power, gentle, caring, seeing the best in others, trusting, optimistic and more. She digs deep into the many pitfalls of being such a sensitive being, and how to learn to be assertive without being aggressive.

For as far back as I can remember, I have found myself giving too much, and yet still feeling like it was not enough. I always had high expectations for what I needed to do for others, but never held anyone to that impossible standard. I even helped people who were quite capable of helping themselves. After reading Doreen's book, I learned that my jumping in to try and "save" them didn't really do them any favors. They have their own path, and their own lessons to learn. I also learned that giving for the wrong reasons can cause resentment, fatigue, money issues, health issues and more. Pure giving, she teaches, is not out of guilt, feeling sorry or obligation. 

She discusses how to set healthy boundaries, how to handle professional victims, gossipers, martyrs, guilt trippers, toxic relationships, narcissists and sociopaths (who tend to take advantage of kind, giving people). 

I was an extremely sensitive and quiet child. Although I was often bullied, it was always easier to stand up for others. I could feel their pain and I didn't want them to suffer. I remember my college years and so enjoying going out with my friends. But I also remember not liking large crowds. Trust me, we had lots of fun together, but I also remember feeling drained (not from my dear friends, just the crowd around us) and needing time by myself too. I honestly felt weird for that. Now at 48, I am more sensitive than ever. I absorb everyone's energy, whether positive or negative. It wears on me. I didn't realize that is what was happening to me, until I read Doreen's book. I thought that I wasn't a strong enough person to have my own thoughts and feelings. I felt weak. That's not what it is. I'm empathic. Picking up on the feelings of my classmates when I was a child, was because I truly could feel what they were feeling. Needing quiet time through my college years (and now too), was because the energy I was picking up was exhausting me. I feel very grateful to Doreen that I can now feel compassion towards myself for who I am, instead of criticism. There are so many ways to look at a situation, and more and more I am taking the positive view. That is what is so wonderful about reading books like this, you can find who you really are, and let go of that negative voice.

Doreen shows how how to enjoy life instead of people pleasing. She talks about following your passion and shows how we can use delay tactics instead of working on our life purpose by overeating, compulsive shopping, addictive internet surfing, substance abuse and more.


She shows us how to shield ourselves from harsh energies with crystals, angel lights, clearing, grounding and trees (yes, go hug a tree, it heals!). Also, you will learn how to have more time and energy by exercising, stretching and releasing, and eating healthfully. 

There is so much wonderful information packed into this book, and what I love about Doreen, is that she is honest and caring. She guides us to be truthful with ourselves about our real intentions, and provides so many tools to live an authentic, positive, peaceful and purposeful life.

As you can probably tell by now, I highly recommend this book.

In Gratitude,

Kerri Mulhern
www.suitablegifts.com


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